It's no secret that it's pretty scary moving far, far away to university, where you most likely don't know anyone or the area at all. I think some degree of homesickness is probably inevitable, however everyone's different and we all cope differently to others. I'm writing this in hope that I can help you if you are going off to university or even just moving away from home, as if like me, you'll be most worried about being in a new place where you don't know anyone and wondering how you'll possibly make friends and not miss your friends and family at home too much!
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Our 'xbox and take-away night' |
My Story
I was one of the little homebodies, who decided not to move too far away. I moved about 2 hours away, which meant that I was able to go home every few weeks, for weekends and reading weeks. A lot of people did this, however, more people tended to stay at their uni accommodation from September and then only came home at Christmas, when you have time off. I was never looking forward to moving away from home as I'm obviously very close with Hannah and we spend a lot of time together, so I knew that I would miss her. I also had my boyfriend close to where I lived.
Sorry Hannah...
I travelled down to my uni with my mum, nan and Hannah. They helped me move in and stayed for a couple of hours before leaving me on my own in this new and scary place! I was dreading them leaving; I hadn't seen anyone in my flat and I felt like I was all alone. I was feeling very emotional and was trying so hard not to let any tears out, as I hate crying in front of people and I didn't want them to worry. As we were saying goodbye, Hannah hugged me and suddenly burst out crying - lots of tears and everything! This obviously set me off. When they left I didn't know what to do, what was I supposed to do here? Who do I talk to?
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Four of my flatmates and I |
Luckily for me, (on this occasion anyway), my room was right next to the kitchen, which I shared with seven other people. I listened out waiting until I heard movement in the kitchen to then go out and 'get a drink.' After tearing for some time, I tidied my self up and with every sound I heard I rushed out to see if I could find anyone. Finally, I was sure that they were at least a few people in the kitchen and went out. They were all just standing around awkwardly, so I said hi... trying to sound as confident as I could. After that it was easy. We started introducing ourselves and then went for a little walk around the area to see what it was like. At the time there were 3 guys and just 1 other girl. After chatting to all of them I felt so much more comfortable; although I still felt homesick and very emotional for the first few days, I was happy that I was making new friends. We then spent more and more time together and the closer and more comfortable we all got with each other, the better I felt about being away from home and my favourite people.
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One of our nights out |
My Advice
Find people on facebook before you go
My univeristy, like most had a facebook group for freshers, which I joined. It was full of people asking who else was doing their subject, I picked out the ones who were asking about law, which is what I am studying and added them as a friend. We could then chat and it was nice being able to discuss uni stuff with people who were in the exact same position. I made friends with 2 people, as not many people seemed to be doing law. It's a great idea to find people before you go as when I met both of them I already felt comfortable with them and felt like I knew them. It was nice to be able to text someone, to meet up with so that I wasn't going to my subject events alone.
Knock on your flatmates doors
I was too shy and didn't want to go knocking on what would be random people's doors, however, it's more than likely that you're all sitting alone in your rooms, scared to come out. Make the first move and put yourself out there to go and find the people you live with, you'll all feel better once you get together and talk. They will definitely be grateful!
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My best friend at uni |
Keep busy
Arrange to do things with the people you live with, or those that you have met on your course, or anywhere else around uni! Go out, try new things, or just simply chatting in a communal area, like your kitchen can really take your mind off of any worries and really helps with homesickness. One of my flat mates brought an old xbox and T.V with her, which we all played for ages. It was a great way of getting everyone together, as pretty much every male likes xbox and if you're like me and haven't previously touched an xbox, it's just something fun to do.
Arrange to cook together
Cooking alone in the kitchen can be very lonely and boring! I would often skip dinner because I couldn't be bothered to go through making something, standing alone in the kitchen and then washing up alone. When I started to arrange to cook my dinner at the same time as some of my friends, it made me much more enthusiastic about trying new things, as you always have someone there for advice and company.
Keep in contact with your friends and family at home
If there's ever a time when there doesn't seem to be many people around to talk to at uni, chatting online or on the phone with friends and family from home can really help. It can be very lonely if you're not with your new uni friends, so it really helps just talking to anyone familiar.
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Fresher's week - Army night |
Don't worry
You're all in the same boat; you're all nervous and worried about fitting in. A couple of weeks into living away, I'm sure that you'll all feel much more comfortable and be really enjoying the whole experience. Although I missed my mum, Hannah and boyfriend, I didn't feel like I needed to go home, if it hadn't been planned for me to come home, I would have been more than happy to stay at uni.
Have fun!
This is probably the first time that you've been away from home, living alone in a new place, so enjoy yourself. There's nothing to worry about and it's a whole new exciting experience. I kind of regret taking first year so seriously, as I turned down a few nights out because I had work to do, however as we all know, first year doesn't count, you only need to pass. You have the next two years to study hard, so enjoy yourself while you can!
Hope this has been somewhat helpful to anyone who is soon to be going off to uni! Let me know if there's anything else you would like to read about? There will be more to come!